The lists are starting to come in....check out South Knox Bubba's who has these gems among many more:

• President Bush and Attorney General John Ashcroft call press conference to announce enactment of Patriot Act III by Executive Order. Law enforcement officials and legal scholars puzzled by bewildering list of new regulations, such as national registration of gas-powered lawn trimmers and edgers, restrictions on the sale of Kaboom brand household cleaning products, and mandatory tracking and reporting of National Hebrew Kosher All-Beef Frank sales.

• After winning the Democratic presidential nomination from James Carville in a poker game, Hunter S. Thompson stuns the nation by winning 92% of the popular vote and the electoral votes of every state except Alabama running on a platform of free guns, free dope and whisky, and free cable TV porn for every American. Bush demands a recount. No paper trail can be produced. John Ashcroft calls for an investigation of Diebold.

• On the day he is released from prison, Tommy Chong purchases the winning Power Ball lottery ticket, claims a $260 million prize, and hires a crack team of cyber-sleuths to investigate John Ashcroft. They discover a huge cache of bizarre and disturbing child porn involving altar boys, Crisco, and twelve swarthy men dressed as the Apostles on Ashcroft's personal home computer.

Update: Don't miss Vodkapundit's predictions either.