In a 430 page opinion, the Pennsylvania Commonwealth Court kicked Ralph Nader off the ballot. Here's why:

"In conclusion the President Judge must state that he has served longer on the Commonwealth Court than any other Judge in the Court's history and as a result thereof has reviewed more nomination petitions than any other Judge in the Court's history. I am compelled to emphasize that this signature gathering process was the most deceitful and fraudulent exercise ever perpetrated upon this Court. The conduct of the Candidates, through their representatives (not their attorneys), shocks the conscience of the Court. In reviewing signatures, it became apparent that in addition to signing names such as "Mickey Mouse", "Fred Flintstone", "John Kerry", and the ubiquitous "Ralph Nader", there were thousands of names that were created at random and then randomly assigned either existent or non-existent addresses by the circulators.

A detailed line-by-line breakdown of the pages and lines reviewed and the reasons for disqualification has been prepared by each judge and follows [on the remaining 430 pages of the opinion] ....The secretary of the Commonweath is directed not to certify the names of Ralph Nader and Peter Miguel Camejo as candidates for President and Vice-President of the United States in the November 2, 2004 general election."

[hat tip to Peter G.]