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In an unguarded moment, perhaps while lying in bed at night or contemplating the reflection in the mirror, you know who you are.  You know what you have endured and experienced, what you have done and considered doing, what you think and feel.  You know of the scars and mistakes and imperfections.  You know of the fears and doubts and urges.  They are your private demons.

Tell me, when you go out in the world or interact with others, do you fully reveal yourself for who you are or perceive yourself to be?  Do you expose your demons?  Or do you go undercover?  Do you assume a public persona to conceal, or even contain, the private one?  In reality, there are few among us who can assert with absolute honesty that they are entirely as they appear.  We all have something or other to hide.

We all wrestle with demons, in some measure.  We all have moments--some more than others, certainly--when a cartoon devil and angel perch upon our shoulders and vie for our attention, if not our soul.  With any luck, the devil is generally not too persuasive or alluring.  But what happens when the fiend is given some help, when someone joins in to fan the flames that are already perilously near?  Will such a convergence of malevolent forces merely hasten the inevitable fall or encourage an unnecessary plummet over the brink?

Regardless, when any one of us is wrestling with demons--whatever they may be--it hardly seems right or kind for others to urge them on.  And to profit from such seems particularly crass and immoral.  Consider what happened recently to Louis Conradt, Jr., as reported on November 7 by the Houston Chronicle:

Suburb cries foul after fatal sex sting

An Internet child-predator sting that led to the apparent suicide of a Dallas-area prosecutor came under attack Monday from the mayor of the suburb that hosted the undercover operation.

Police said former Kaufman County District Attorney Louis "Bill" Conradt Jr. solicited sex from a decoy posing online as a 13-year-old boy and killed himself at his home on Sunday when officers closed in with arrest and search warrants.

As police explained they could do nothing to prevent the shooting, the mayor in Murphy took issue with them for locating the sting in the suburb of 3,000 residents, 20 miles northeast of Dallas.

"I don't think bringing predators into the middle of our neighborhoods where children live is the answer to the problem," said Mayor Bret Baldwin.

Baldwin said the operation, which he didn't know about, was "sensational" and "designed to sell ads" because it was filmed by a network television crew

Murphy police, a volunteer group called Perverted Justice and the NBC news show Dateline set up the final chapter of their sting last week in a house in a Murphy subdivision, said Sgt. Snow Robertson, a Murphy police spokesman.....

After Dateline confronted and filmed the men inside the house, they were arrested as they left, police said.

Conradt, who was chief felony assistant district attorney for nearby Rockwall County at the time of his death, did not show up at the sting house Saturday night, when he had agreed to meet a child, said Xavier Von Erck, founder of Perverted Justice.

On Sunday, when authorities arrived to serve warrants at his house in nearby Terrell, the 56-year-old prosecutor killed himself.

Robertson said police had "plenty of evidence" to charge Conradt with the second-degree felony of soliciting sex from a minor based on his Internet chat, which dated back over the past month. They also had obtained a search warrant to seize his laptop computer.

Conradt refused to answer his door for police. After they heard a gunshot, they forced their way in. Conradt later died at a Dallas hospital from what authorities said was a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

Conradt, who lived alone, had served more than 20 years as Kaufman County's district attorney until 2002, when he ran unsuccessfully for a district judge post.

"We tried to have Terrell police who knew him go to the door and make the arrest," said Robertson, who acknowledged that an NBC crew was waiting on the street outside Conradt's house. "There is no way we could have prevented this from happening."

Robertson said he thinks the prosecutor knew why police and TV crew were at his house. "It was pretty obvious," he said....

Baldwin, the mayor, said residents who lived near the sting house complained that the operation was upsetting.

"They had to witness the takedowns (arrests) on the front lawn and witness some of the high-speed chases that started at the house," he said. "One neighbor had drugs -- cocaine, I believe -- tossed out a window into his yard from a fleeing car."

No elected officials were notified in advance of the sting, police said....

Baldwin said his criticism of the operation has prompted a host of negative e-mails from Perverted Justice supporters. "We're being bombed with e-mail from people who think this is the greatest thing and who wonder why we're not all for it," he said....

The self-styled watchdog group, which gets paid a consulting fee from Dateline and its ongoing series on the stings, has earned the respect of some police departments and has developed expertise in luring online predators. Others, however, express concern with the group's lack of professional training and its routine introduction of news cameras into police work.

"Do you really want citizen groups running around imposing their own form of justice?" Brad Russ, with the Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force, asked the Los Angeles Times last month. The federally funded network includes 1,200 law enforcement agencies fighting online predators.

Defense lawyers say the teaming of law enforcement with private groups and media outlets casts doubt on the objectivity of such investigations.

"We should be very concerned about this dangerous trend of combining law enforcement with sensationalistic commercial television," said Tim Evans, a Fort Worth attorney.

Other lawyers who have represented men arrested in such stings say they use sophisticated methods to lure men who would otherwise be unlikely to act on what they claim are only sexual fantasies.  [full text]

More than a week later, it remains unclear what exactly led Louis Conradt to end his life or what crimes--beyond soliciting sex from [a decoy posing as] a minor--he may have committed.  It remains unclear why he opted not to "show up at the sting house," whether he sensed a trap or simply could not go through with it.  It remains unclear what demons he may have wrestled with or what might have happened if Perverted Justice and Dateline had not conspired to urge the demons on.  Who can say?

What does seem clear is that the tactics and motives of those who set up the sting operation were more than a little dubious.  As one resident of Murphy, Texas put it: "The ends were admirable, but the means showed poor judgment."  Indeed, one would be hard pressed to oppose taking appropriate action to prevent children from being abused or exploited and to capture and hold accountable those who would perpetrate such terrible acts.  As a child and family therapist, I have witnessed firsthand the devastating impact of sexual abuse.  No child deserves to endure such.  And no perpetrator can excuse such--even though a great many were once victims of abuse themselves.  It is ever an irony of human behavior that some who have been badly mistreated, who know all too well of the resulting horrors, later come to inflict such upon others.  Interrupting this tragic cycle and saving children from harm is a laudable goal.

But the end does not justify any means whatsoever.  In substituting gimmicky vigilantism for meaningful intervention, Perverted Justice and Dateline demonstrate that their desire "To Catch a Predator" is superficial and self-serving--not to mention sordid and exploitative.  Their tactics are morally, if not legally, suspect.  It is little wonder that they have more than their share of critics:

Upon reflection, it is also little wonder that Perverted Justice came into being when it did, during a period when the leaders of this country shamelessly exploited tragedy and fear for personal and political gain, when "anything goes" became the guiding principle of those entrusted To Catch a Terrorist.  Anything does not go, though.  The end does not universally justify the means.  Even a child knows this.

It would not surprise me if some who read these words question whether my sympathies lie with the devils, with the terrorists and pedophiles and others who would cause harm to innocents.  That is not the case.  I take strong exception to any hurtful intentions or behavior.  Nevertheless, I refuse to adhere to a mentality that simply insists they are all bad and we are nothing like them and that leaves little room for dialogue or debate.  I refuse to accept that any means, however draconian or unsavory, is justifiable to catch the "bad guys."  I refuse to settle for band-aids and gimmicks in lieu of substantive solutions.  Like it or not, terrorism and pedophilia are complex problems.  There are no simple answers or quick fixes.  By opting for such, we close our eyes to a deeper understanding of the forces and factors that shape and influence those who would willfully commit atrocities.  And, in so doing, we lose sight of not just their humanity but our own.

Remember, before there were Devils, there were demons.  And we all wrestle with demons.

(NOTE: This diary may also be found at Kmareka.com.)

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      No simple answers.. (none / 0) (#1)
      by Edger on Wed Nov 15, 2006 at 03:10:46 PM EST
      Like it or not, terrorism and pedophilia are complex problems.  There are no simple answers or quick fixes.  By opting for such, we close our eyes to a deeper understanding of the forces and factors that shape and influence those who would willfully commit atrocities.  And, in so doing, we lose sight of not just their humanity but our own.

      Well expressed good food for thought, David.

      "A man's most open actions have a secret side to them."
      --Joseph Conrad

      I agree. (3.00 / 2) (#2)
      by aw on Tue Dec 05, 2006 at 05:24:22 PM EST
      There are reasons why we're not supposed to take the law into our own hands.  Perverted Justice, indeed.

      Parent
      Completely Disagree (none / 0) (#3)
      by gbrooks on Sat Jan 20, 2007 at 01:23:00 AM EST
      I'm a liberal and your comments on child predators and the group Perverted Justice make me think the unthinkable - I might prefer to be a republican after all! Egad! God 4bid! But how can I agree with you, knowing that I've gone online and 14 and 17 yr old boys have tried to chat me up and I have deleted and blocked them without hesitation. In fact, I get disgusted they'd want to talk to a 30 yr old woman. If I can hang up on them, those men should not dare solicit a minor. It's unforgivable! Those men have a choice to make, a choice many of us make when we get online. We don't talk to minors. God knows there are enough grown-ups to talk to. I applaud Perverted Justice and if a predator decides to take his own life, all the better for the rest of us. Less scum to worry about. Do you know the hierachy of scum top to bottom? Karl Rove, George Bush, terrorists, pedophiles.

      get the violins out (none / 0) (#4)
      by yohero on Fri Mar 23, 2007 at 02:23:20 AM EST
      dear David,
                drop the liberal pity party for pedophiles. these jerks are sick beyond repair. don't believe me? invite one of them to your house for a sleep over. bet they molest your son or daughter before sunrise. you should be on your knees thanking Perverted Justice. those little poeple in that small Texas town think crime should only happen in the inner city i.e.."this kind of thing never happens here". wake up people,there are pedophiles in every neighborhood in America. stop whining cause your perfectly manicured lawn had some litter thrown on it,it'll live. but when a kid is sexually molested something dies inside that kid. it's called innocence. these sicko's deserve to be exposed on national tv for who they are. no one made them chat with the underaged potential victim.no one made them get in their car and drive to that location where the cameras were waiting.stop feeling sorry for these perverts cause they deserve what they got.how many kids have they already destroyed before they were caught by To Catch A Predator.these are adults and they know right from wrong but choose to do wrong anyway cause they think society is to stupid to get a clue.that's why they look so surprised when they're finally caught.they are even lobbying are lawmakers to relax the laws that protect children from them in order to make it easier for them to fly under the radar undetected.yeah we all wrestle with devil's and demons but at the end of the day if you let them overcome you don't blame Perverted Justice and say it was a set up.this guy that committed suicide when he got busted was a district attorney who knows the law backwards and yet he still broke it,what does that tell you about rehabilitating a pedophile...it's hopeless.this ain't Bangkok or Amsterdam Dave this is America.having sex with underage children is against the law.remember JonBenet Ramsey,Hedi Klass,etc.etc.etc.these guys and sometimes women are not able to control their urges.so that little devil's and demons analogy does not apply here.and here's another funny quote from you that had me rolling over with laughter... "In substituting gimmicky vigilantism for meaningful intervention, Perverted Justice and Dateline demonstrate that their desire "To Catch a Predator" is superficial and self-serving--not to mention sordid and exploitative".hey Dave,what type of meaningful intervention would you suggest...holding hands in a circle and singing Kumbayah.as for being superficial,self-serving,sordid,and exploitative aren't those the same qualities we find in every child pedophile.to catch a pedophile Dave you have to match them trait for trait.by the way for those of you who don't know Kumbayah means"come by here" and it appears that's exactly what these child predators did.