Rep. John Conyers has subpoenaed Karl Rove again to testify about White House influence on the prosecution of Don Siegelman, but Rove's lawyer claims that executive privilege invoked by President Bush still applies, and Obama is bound by his oath of office to maintain Constitutional separation of powers by endorsing Rove's immunity and instructing the Attorney General to resist the Congressional subpoena. So...  

Will Obama support executive privilege for Rove, or not?

Otherwise Obama has to give up his pipe-dreams of bipartisanship, and declare all-out war on Republicans by nullifying the claim of executive privilege and forcing Rove to testify, and it's war because the former President and Vice-President are only one step behind Rove as targets for prosecution. This would be the mythical equivalent of kidnapping Merlin from a Republican Camelot, and the boy-king Arthur W. Bush would be duty-bound to rally his knights in exile and storm the White House!

Or will Obama betray the credulous peasants who made him their king, and ally himself instead with the dark hordes of disorder and eternal sorrow?

Both alternatives are obviously impossible, and if Barack Obama is squeezed into the infinitesimal branch-point of this paradox, then the Universe will accordingly fall into a Logical Singularity where all known laws of physics and politics will be abrogated!

Our world will be swallowed by a black hole of Chaos and Unreason!

Bipartisanship is Obama, and Obama is bipartisanship, from his first real blip on the national radar at the Democratic National Convention in 2004, right through his otherwise incomprehensible and completely useless attempt to rally Republican support for his economic stimulus with humongous tax-cuts.

No entity can act in absolute opposition to its essence! Obama cannot abandon bipartisanship and declare war on Republicans by seizing their Merlin.

But not even the Arthurian Merlin could so mystify the rubes that they accept Obama's Department of Justice defending Karl Rove against a Congressional subpoena!

It's like biting the head off a chicken and screaming "Hail Satan!"

If Obama is abandoned by his outraged base, his fragile identity would be undone, the mask of Barack Obama, Progressive Hero would disappear, and only the original face of Little Orphan Obama would remain, abandoned by Dad and dumped on the grandparents by Ma Dunham, desperately cobbling together a credible persona in the lily-white paradise of a Hawaiian prep-school.

Obama cannot return to that nightmare of anomie! But he cannot make war on Republicans! Neither A or Not-A!

A logical apocalypse!

So anyone who wants our old familiar Universe to creep along through the next Great Depression that is already rolling down upon us, and anyone who wants a ring-side seat when either India and Pakistan or North and South Korea take that last little step into nuclear war and poison what's left of our already almost poisonous atmosphere...

Anyone who wants to survive for the next few years of our miserable future should call, write, or email John Conyers and tell him to stop squeezing Barack Obama into a paradoxical branch-point that will plunge our Universe into the nothingness of Singularity and Annihilation!

But there's obviously room for reasonable people to disagree on this issue, and maybe it's just as well to skip the last few chapters of humanity's absurd tragedy or sad farce, and let the whole thing disappear in one painless, illogical poof!