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Jesse James Enters AZ Treatment Facility: Too Little, Too Late?

By Jeralyn, Section Media
Posted on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 11:32:07 AM EST
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I can't see how Jesse James will ever get Sandra Bullock back, but checking into an inpatient AZ facility specializing in "drug, alcohol and sex addiction, as well as other disorders" is probably a good start for his new life sans-Sandra.

Was Bullock really that clueless? Like Tiger, it seems James was leading a double life, not just having an occasional fling. Can any amount of "treatment" restore the trust necessary to rebuild these relationships?

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    Jesse James Enters AZ Treatment Facility: Too Little, Too Late? | 28 comments (28 topical)

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    Was Bullock clueless? (5.00 / 2) (#5)
    by Anne on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 12:10:46 PM EST
    Why does it matter?  Would it mitigate what her husband did?  "Oh, you were stupid, so, see, it's your fault for not catching me; you should have been paying attention!"

    The private lives of public figures will, I guess, always be objects of fascination and speculation - why, I have no idea.  Do we want to know that they're "just like everyone else?"  Or, is it the schadenfreude?  I'm sure lots of people will be pulling for Tiger to miss the cut at the Masters because, after all he did, he just doesn't deserve to win and get another big, fat check.

    Whatever the reasons for all the interest, it sure sells a lot of magazines...

    Schadenfreude seems to be part of it (none / 0) (#20)
    by bridget on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 07:07:35 PM EST
    I don't know Sondra's husband at all from TV, film or however he made his living. Heard that he had a show "Monstergarage" but have never seen it.

    It semed to me that she was thoroughly fooled by him  - and she seemed v. much in love w. him.

    I watched the Golden Globes and the Oscars and both times SB thanked him profusely...

    I am sure she would have never have done it had she known how much he betrayed her. Both times she said that she is a better actress because of him, makes better films because of him, and basically got the awards thanks to him ... and that she never before had someone who supported her the way he did ( I think she said he got her back etc.). She probably said the same thing on other award shows and her total devotion to her husband in public really took me by surprise. And there he was listening to it all ...

    I just can't imagine that she would have said any of these things had she known how dishonest and undeserving he was ... for years most likely.

    She must have felt very embarrassed for having said all these things about someone who deserved none of it. I felt v. bad for her.

    P.S. So another "jerk"  hopes that "treatment" will save his career. It is so incredible phony. The marriage is over IMO.

    Parent

    How 'bout respecting people's personal decisions (5.00 / 1) (#6)
    by Ellie on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 12:21:42 PM EST
    ... about who they are, and whether it's a process, a done deal, hard-wiring or the ambivalent "lifestyle choice" (and so on).

    Unless I'm asked directly for my $0.03, it's simply not my place to define anyone else's private existence, barring public figures (ab)using public resources or those who publish about it and invite comment.

    Sandra Bullock spends months at a time (5.00 / 1) (#7)
    by sarcastic unnamed one on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 12:31:45 PM EST
    away from home and her husband on movie sets.

    I imagine it would not be very difficult for either of them to keep surprising secrets from the other.

    Was that blackguard Cole Younger (none / 0) (#8)
    by jondee on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 12:36:56 PM EST
    also involved in this outrage upon the God bequeathed restraints of christian society?

    Oh sorry, wrong Jesse James..

    Parent

    For how often it is said that (5.00 / 1) (#10)
    by Inspector Gadget on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 01:51:44 PM EST
    men simply have a non-stop interest in s*x, I find the claim of an addiction difficult to accept. Who wants the stoopid guy who doesn't have the ability to recognize the value of the trust and devotion they have in the person they committed themselves to? Rehab seems like an attempt at swapping victim roles..."I'm trying to get help for my illness, will she be fair enough to understand that and keep me on her bank account?"

    new double standard (2.00 / 1) (#22)
    by diogenes on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 08:16:32 PM EST
    When men do this they are "creeps" and "sex addicts".  When women do this we say "You go girl", dub them cougars, and make fun of their cuckolded, wimpy husbands.

    Who does that? (5.00 / 2) (#23)
    by Inspector Gadget on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 08:27:24 PM EST
    Name one woman who was given great accolades for such betrayal.

    You're really just trying to start something because you obviously haven't the slightest clue what the meaning of "cougar" is. Hint: It is NOT a cheating woman.

    Parent

    Why blame Bullock? (none / 0) (#1)
    by kmblue on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 11:45:16 AM EST
    Jeez, Jeralyn.

    It's (none / 0) (#2)
    by TeresaInSnow2 on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 11:46:39 AM EST
    like trying to cure someone of their sexual orientation. (not that I'm implying in any way that a person's God-given sexual orientation is in any way like the behavior of people like Jesse James and Tiger Woods, other than in the fact that biochemistry is involved).  When something is built into a person's DNA and their body chemistry, it isn't curable, it's a product of nature.

    I'm pretty that (5.00 / 1) (#3)
    by Emma on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 11:48:57 AM EST
    My being a lesbian isn't in my DNA or my body chemistry or given to me by god.  I choose who I want to be, who I want to be with, and what I do about it.

    Parent
    Thank you, finally a non-essentialist theory of (none / 0) (#12)
    by FoxholeAtheist on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 02:48:10 PM EST
    sexual orientation. Count me in.

    Parent
    All theories are gray.. (none / 0) (#13)
    by jondee on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 03:13:56 PM EST
    the golden tree of life is green..

    Goethe

    Parent

    And so? (none / 0) (#14)
    by FoxholeAtheist on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 04:10:25 PM EST


    Parent
    Best question I've heard all day (none / 0) (#15)
    by jondee on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 04:14:45 PM EST
    now we're getting somewhere..

    Parent
    Be my guest, answer away - as BTD would say. (none / 0) (#17)
    by FoxholeAtheist on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 05:29:45 PM EST


    Parent
    OK (none / 0) (#25)
    by Emma on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 08:47:26 PM EST
    You're in.  :)

    I just got really tired of all the arguments for gay rights that started from "I can't help it!"  It irritated me so much, I really took some time to think about who I am.  

    I like being a lesbian.  It's a 100% positive part of my life.  I don't feel like I was born a lesbian, or that I can't help being a lesbian.  I really feel that I choose the life I want and the life I choose is being a lesbian.

    Parent

    Amen, amen. Hmmm, let's see... (none / 0) (#26)
    by FoxholeAtheist on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 10:18:16 PM EST
    As women and feminists, we are very well-acquainted with the hazards of essentialist explanations for what people do in life. I.e. the pernicious idea that men are inherently aggressive and women are inherently passive. Not hard to see who's going to get the short(er) end of the stick there. For that reason alone, it wouldn't be unreasonable for women to question essentialist theories.

    On the other hand, most men are seemingly far less leery of the notion that their behavior is in their nature. Perhaps because they like most of the qualities that get attributed to them. I.e. they are given the message that they are better leaders, that they're smarter, more decisive, more logical, more objective, etc.

    When it comes to sexual orientation, it seems that the prevailing over-insistence on "being born that way" started in the gay male community and spread outwards. It has become so canonized that anybody who doesn't get with the dogma is in danger of being considered a homophobe. Like Bill Richardson during the '08 primaries.

    FWIW, it's my belief that the wholesale, uncritical LGBTQ return to essentialism is a step backward; to a way of thinking that inadvertently feeds into sexism, racism, homophobia and any number of other isms stemming from the notion that whole groups of people are born with fixed qualities.

    That's my two cents.

    Parent

    Genetic Morality (none / 0) (#9)
    by Discovery on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 01:42:25 PM EST
    Didn't realize that morality is a genetic code.  And for those that choose to uphold marriage vows and not lie, cheat and sleep with other people outside our spouse apparently never had a choice - it was just genetics.

    Wow. (if I missed your sarcasm in your post - forgive me.  Otherwise I am amazed at your statement.)

    Parent

    I'm pretty sure the (none / 0) (#24)
    by Inspector Gadget on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 08:33:53 PM EST
    s*x addict thing was self-diagnosed as a cure for how much of his wealth is about to be yanked out of the joint checking account.

    How can a couple of weeks of addiction therapy cure whatever missing element to his character causes him to be a selfish liar who plays hard and fast with another's trust? This guy needs years of therapy for the real problem he has. All men are "addicted" to s8x, from what I hear through their own admissions.


    Parent

    The author who wrote the (none / 0) (#28)
    by hairspray on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 11:40:12 PM EST
    "Female Brain" has written another book on the male brain.  She says that a center in the brain associated with sex is 2.5 X greater in the male than in the female and that is the cause of all of the male promiscuousness.

    Parent
    The Neo-Nazi stuff (none / 0) (#4)
    by lilburro on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 11:51:19 AM EST
    is a little different though...

    A bad choice from the get go (none / 0) (#11)
    by Saul on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 02:15:30 PM EST
    IMO.  Never understood what Sandra and Jesse had in common or why she got involved with this guy.  He seemed so out of her league socially.

    I saw a several of his motorcycle shows on TV and he came off to me as a jerk.

    Who Can Account (5.00 / 1) (#18)
    by norris morris on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 06:36:39 PM EST
    for who finds who attractive and lovable?

    He appears very unsuitable on many levels, but hey no one can figure out what turns people on and what their needs are.

    The whole thing should be a private matter between the two of them. But...his behavior made that impossible, and his comments are really that of a dork who's desperate for forgiveness and/or at least victimhood. He is responsible for his bhavior and living a double life has its consequences.  Notwithstanding his lousy choices infidelity, etc should be handled privately.

    This guy is a circus.

    Parent

    I find it difficult to get the image of him (5.00 / 1) (#19)
    by Inspector Gadget on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 07:06:29 PM EST
    sitting in the audience while she told him how much he meant to her -- tearing up and looking at her so lovingly, as though he deserved that loyal embrace from her heart.

    What. A. Creep.

    I would find it so easy to walk away and never look back after that level of betrayal. Just cheating with someone else, I could get past, but this was him accepting her honesty and commitment and giving her selfish lies in return.

    Parent

    Exaxtly. You said it so well. (none / 0) (#21)
    by bridget on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 07:17:31 PM EST
    I said basically the same in my post ... I just can't get over how he accepted her total devotion and all the compliments as if he deserved it all. She must have been in total shock once she found out the truth about him.

    Yes. Creep is the word.

    Parent

    he came off that way (none / 0) (#16)
    by Jeralyn on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 05:05:09 PM EST
    on Celebrity Apprentice too.

    Parent
    Come on, busy women? (none / 0) (#27)
    by Militarytracy on Wed Mar 31, 2010 at 10:38:25 PM EST
    Hell ya you can be involved with someone who is leading a double life and not know it.  I was engaged to someone who became addicted to meth, he was very hard working :)....we had just started a new business and when he couldn't sleep at night and said he was worried about money I believed him totally.  It was a horrible rude awakening when someone revealed to me what was going on, but everything clicked at the same time too.  I'm not going to hound my significant other to death though trying to make sure I "really know this person".  Time will tell.  But knowing that my husband is regularly drug tested I do think made him oddly appealing after surviving the other break up.  Cheating men though, I can smell that fairly easily....but my father was a serial cheater.  I know what it walks like and quacks like.  I always had a strange feeling about that particular coupleship because Jesse's past smelled like ummmm a serial cheater :)  My husband has always liked Sandra Bullock.  When he saw the front of the gossip mags a few days ago he said, "I could have called that....that was obvious".  And here I thought he was just jealous that Jesse got Sandra and he didn't :)  Who knows if such relationships can heal and make it.  Al Franken made it with his very alcoholic wife...so who knows?

    Jesse James Enters AZ Treatment Facility: Too Little, Too Late? | 28 comments (28 topical)

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