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"Like something green that comes up..."

Are you sitting down?  Stupid question.  Of course, you're sitting down.  Who stands up in front of the computer?  Well, maybe people who do not own chairs or have injured their buttocks.  Oops, I used the word buttocks.  Second time in two days.  Normally, I try to avoid using such raw language in my writing.  I hope that I did not offend you.  Although I cannot really imagine how I could have caused offense.  I merely used a word that describes an essential part of the human anatomy.  I even resisted the temptation to employ coarse slang--such as can, keister, heinie, tush, wazoo, fanny, or my current favorite, ba-donka-donk.

In any regard, is there anyone among us who is not equipped with buttocks?  Granted, there are some who have difficulty distinguishing this part of their anatomy from their elbow or a hole in the ground.  A few members of Congress and loutish pundits come to mind.  Nonetheless, they still possess a rump.  And a chest (for thumping).  And a stomach (for gorging).  And a mouth (for sneering).  And a head and shoulders (for shampooing).  And too many other body parts to mention.  By the way, do any of these anatomical terms cause you offense or unease?  Are you shocked to see them in print?  No?  Then sit your buttocks down and prepare yourself...

[Insert ominous music.]

How about scrotum?  Granted, some of you lack this physical accoutrement and perhaps find it as bewildering and foreign as Yemen.  But roughly half of the world's population is in possession of the family jewels--myself included (although once, as a teen walking away from a fight, I was accused of not having any).  It is part of my physiology.  This is no big secret.  This is not a matter of national security to be withheld from the public.  This is nothing to be ashamed about.  So why does the word scrotum elicit disapprobation or discomfort?  Why do some frown at the use of the term and seek to protect their children from exposure to such language?  It all seems rather arbitrary and silly.  Not to mention repressed.  Case in point, the following news article in the New York Times:

With One Word, Children's Book Sets Off Uproar

The word "scrotum" does not often appear in polite conversation. Or children's literature, for that matter.

Yet there it is on the first page of "The Higher Power of Lucky," by Susan Patron, this year's winner of the Newbery Medal, the most prestigious award in children's literature. The book's heroine, a scrappy 10-year-old orphan named Lucky Trimble, hears the word through a hole in a wall when another character says he saw a rattlesnake bite his dog, Roy, on the scrotum.

"Scrotum sounded to Lucky like something green that comes up when you have the flu and cough too much," the book continues. "It sounded medical and secret, but also important."

The inclusion of the word has shocked some school librarians, who have pledged to ban the book from elementary schools, and reopened the debate over what constitutes acceptable content in children's books.  [full text]

What utter nonsense!  Though it does seem apropos of the times.  In the current battle against so-called Islamic extremism, a good many civilians--who had the misfortune of simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time but had done no real harm--were detained and designated "enemy combatants."  In the current battle against so-called liberal extremism, a good many anatomical terms--which had the misfortune of simply being in the wrong place (on the body) at the wrong time (neo-Puritan era) but had done no real harm--were constrained and designated "private parts" (and thus verboten).  Not surprisingly, conservatives have led the way in these battles, often zealously.  They are out of line.  And out of step.  And partially out of their minds.

In fairness, I suppose they genuinely mean well and want what's best for their children.  But, as Martin Luther King, Jr. once opined, "nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."  Our progress as individuals and as a nation can only be impeded when we allow ignorance and fear and intolerance to be our guides.  Scrotum is not a bad word.  But knee-jerk is.  No good can come of taking undue offense at the innocuous and then reflexively engaging in repression.  No good can come of keeping people in the dark when it is neither needed nor deserved.

Dr. King also said that "darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."  Haven't we enough darkness already?  Do we really need to augment such by promoting censorship because of one descriptive word?  It is time to step out into the light and embrace the glorious diversity of human language, culture, and anatomy.  It begins with a scrotum.  Say it with me...

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    Thanks, David. (none / 0) (#1)
    by Edger on Mon Feb 19, 2007 at 10:15:36 AM EST
    I'm glad someone has the cohones to tell people to pull their heads out of their wazoos and quit pooping themselves over (gasp!) scrotums.

    Only a librarian who is an ass would want to ban a book containing the word scrotum.